Sir, you will need a passport for that!

Sir, you will need a passport for that!

Some of my favourite stories so far. The first day I went into a 7/11 and asked if they had any gum. With a mixture of shock and disgust, the woman told me I had to go to a special store and show my passport. I have not found that special store yet, and come to think of it, I have no idea where my passport is!

I just got back from the bank where I set up an account. It was a three hour ideal with signatures, paperwork and forms galore. To get into the Internet to do your banking you have to use four levels. Your name and password and telephone number and a special code which changes by the moment. I have a gadget that I must keep and press for a number when I want to get into my account. However, that is not the story. I was waiting for the woman to meet with me to do the paperwork and old Chinese guy with one tooth and a great smile sat down beside me. As we were talking he said; “ Enjoy your youth while you have it!” Nothing like an experience like that to make me feel younger.

Last week-end I went to Little India and was quite impressed with the sounds and smells, which I imagine might actually be like India. What surprised me the most were the” authentic” Thai massage places. Authentic in the sense that you get a traditional Thai massage for $40 that would cost you $10 in Thailand but given by trained Thai masseuses. Like my first Thai massage many years ago, my masseuse could not believe how inflexible I was and kept calling through the curtain to the other massage lady telling her about me and laughing her head off. My body parts simply refused to be coerced to go in the directions she was pushing and pulling them. I could not move my neck all week and my legs were stiff for about three days.
I did buy a phone and the first night dutifully charged it, all night. Actually, the light from the telephone kept flashing all night and kept me up. When I got to school, I asked a colleague how it worked because I could not turn it on. He fiddled with it for about five minutes and he could not get it to work either. I did not feel so stupid until he took the back off and saw why it was not working…no battery. I had no idea I even had to put in a battery!

The first night I was in the new apartment , it is two bedroom with two en suites if anyone wants to visit,I took a bath, which was fairly uneventful. When I got out of the bathtub I was shocked that the floor of the bathroom was covered in water up to my ankles. I called a guy to fix it and found out the problem. There is one drain, for the toilet, sink, bath and so on and it could not drain fast enough when I let the water out of the tub. The poor guy had no tools, which I found dubious but he had no trouble fixing it. He simply opened up the drain and spent the next thirty minutes dredging up the gunk that had accumulated over the years and was blocking the free flow of water. His arm was so black he could not even wash it off. Now I can’t wash the gunk out of the sink.

Talking about black…I was fingerprinted. No, not before they put me in jail. To get an apartment, or work for that matter, you have to get an employment pass. I was shocked when I was told to put my thumb on this machine. I do have a good looking thumb, mind you.

Who knows what adventure will happen to me this week-end. Happy New Year to you.